Throwing My First Unconventional Celebration: A “Back-To-School” Shower

Why do people believe that celebrations should be limited to traditional occasions? Nobody bats an eye when they receive an invitation to attend an anniversary, birthday, or graduation party, nor do they question whether they should bring a congratulatory gift. We celebrate dozens of these types of events each year, but what are other equally significant milestone events that go under the radar? 

What about the different achievements that people work tirelessly for, or the commitments and sacrifices that we make to better our community? Whether it’s receiving that much-deserved promotion at work, getting accepted to the school of your dreams, or starting your own business, you deserve to not only be acknowledged for these accomplishments but to be celebrated!

It’s time we push back against societal norms and honor what’s important to us. We’re giving you permission to celebrate success on your own terms. Tell people what you’re proud of and give them the opportunity to share in your happiness and success!

Celebrating the Non-Traditional: My “Back-to-School” Shower

When I was accepted into the Doctor of Public Health (DrPH) program at Claremont Graduate University’s School of Community & Global Health, I was over the moon. Not only was I the first female in my family to obtain both an undergraduate and graduate degree, but I felt like I had achieved a lifelong, personal goal.

I had managed to get through the grueling application process that asked me to tear apart my professional career and academic history, and I was able to convincingly explain my desire to pursue my path toward higher education. 

Throughout my career, I’ve centered my work around reproductive justice and women’s access to health care. Women’s empowerment is at the heart of what I do. The academic choices and career path that I’ve taken are a testament to my desire to tackle socially driven issues impacting women and girls around the world. My new degree would help me to expand these aspirations and enhance my intellectual horizons – definitely a reason to plan a party, right?!  

I wanted to celebrate the journey that I was about to embark on, so I decided to throw myself a “Back-To-School” Shower. This party was bigger than myself; it was a statement about women’s fundamental rights to choice and autonomy.

Of course, my family and friends had never been to or heard of such a shower before. Why would they have? It’s not mainstream. It isn’t even something that most people would consider gathering for. However, it was for me, not them!

Party Planning for the Unconventional 

I decided to treat this “Back-To-School” party just like any of the other important milestone events that people may be accustomed to. I created unique invitations that adequately represented who I was and what I was aiming to achieve- a fun, elegant, joyous, and simultaneously empowering event. After being perfected, these customized print invites were mailed out to the people I loved and cherished the most. 

On the night of my event, 80 people gathered at a local Los Angeles Thai restaurant for a tasty dinner and open bar for wine and beer. Thai food is my favorite, so it felt like the perfect venue to reserve for this special occasion. I even made an extra personal touch by leaving a pair of takeaway chopsticks at each guest’s place setting. These chopsticks served as a “Thank You” gift as well as a souvenir from my recent (2 weeks prior to the event) solo trip to Singapore. So, in a sense, these chopsticks were a mini celebration all on their own of yet another milestone worth celebrating– solo travel!  Everything about the evening was authentic to me. It was my “Back-To-School” Shower. My way of celebrating my inner self. My way of sharing what is near and dear to me. 

As the celebration continued into the night, I was showered with a champagne toast from my family and friends. Given that there wasn’t a precedent for this type of event, many people were slightly unsure of what to say. However, this didn’t hold them back! People expressed everything from how proud they were of my accomplishment, to well wishes, and pieces of advice.

In no way was I embarrassed to break from the norm and host this non-traditional party. Not only did several of the guests comment on how much they loved my idea, but they expressed how it could inspire other women to throw their own unconventional celebrations. To me, this was empowering!

Showers are, in essence, celebrations of support and solidarity for our loved ones’ most joyous (and challenging!) life moments. My vision is a world where the norm is throwing showers for ALL of life’s milestones and transitions where encouragement and love are most needed, for instance– finalizing a divorce, moving into your first apartment, staying sober, switching career paths, going through a breakup, or coming out.

Rewriting Registry Protocol 

I was ecstatic to be returning to school, yet I was less than enthusiastic to pay for the textbooks and other supplies that I would need for the upcoming year. How could I obtain these items without breaking the bank? My answer was simple….create a college registry at Target® with all the items that I would need and ask guests to bring these in lieu of gifts.

I loved the wit and creativity I used on my hard-copy invitations, so why not include the registry information like a true shower invitation as well?! Rather than having my guests waste their money on gifts I either didn’t need or wouldn’t use, I simply directed them toward items that were more relevant and would make an impact as I began my new chapter.

Do I feel ashamed that I included a registry and told guests what I wanted? No. As a matter of fact, I wholeheartedly encourage other people to follow suit. Registries can be used for any type of occasion, big or small.

The Beginning of a Movement

When I look back at that night, I remember more than just the food and drinks that were served and the gifts that were given. I can feel the love, support, and merriment from everyone in attendance. Reflecting on these positive thoughts helps me overcome the stressors and obstacles that I face as a doctoral student. To this day, I use these special memories to keep myself motivated and invigorated when I feel overwhelmed with my studies and responsibilities. 

I want my “Back-To-School” Shower to encourage women to celebrate what’s important to them. Society shouldn’t dictate what we honor. We, as women, have the power and opportunity to do that for ourselves. Creating our own celebrations is a beautiful way to show the world who we are and what we stand for. Party Positivity calls womxn to take the initiative in hosting celebrations that radiate their identity, femininity, and power. In that same light, the movement urges fellow women friends, family members, co-workers, and colleagues to throw these celebrations for other women– to show that we as a community value their unique life journeys and milestones.

Are you ready to celebrate your way on your terms? We’re here to help you do just that. Download our party positive freebie guides to start planning your own unique events today!